is reflecting on the from .
Speaking out for the first time since going public with their split, the 56-year-old Canadian actor alleged to the that they "had been having problems" for a while but "it just got worse because we stopped sleeping in the same room."
McDermott claims their sleeping arrangements shifted when Spelling, 50, allegedly brought animals — including a pig and multiple dogs — into their bedroom. The actor also says a chicken was living in their bathroom.
"We know dogs have accidents, and our particular dogs were having a lot. And I just couldn't deal with that anymore," he recalled. "So, I created a healthy boundary for myself and I said, 'I can't do this. I can't live and sleep in this kind of condition.' I drew that boundary for myself and moved to another room and things just progressed from there. There were no efforts to sort of remedy the problem to get back into the room."
As the pair grew more distant, McDermott admitted that his longtime struggles with substance abuse flared up. Meanwhile, he said the 50-year-old alum also : daughters and Hattie Margaret, plus sons , and .
"I just isolated more and more and more and she isolated with the kids. We were roommates. Rarely, rarely, rarely did we eat together. We'd sit down and have a family meal but it was always disjointed," he said. "It made me feel worse because I knew I was a big part of [the problem] and I was at a place where I felt there was nothing I could do about it. Add in the fact that we're not sleeping in the same bed — it's like docking your iPhone at night. If you don't dock your iPhone at night, you wake up with a dead battery."
He explained, "I believe that the marital bed is the docking station for your relationship. Where you connected each other. It's where you download information. It's where you spend time together. It's where you're intimate, it's where you love. You laugh and you cry. So that's gone. The relationship suffers greatly, greatly. When you're in a roommate situation and there's no connection or intimacy, what do you expect is going to happen?"
McDermott shared, "I've never been so lonely in the same house with six other people, never been so lonely in my life. I didn't know how to get out of the situation I was in. I was hurting. I was heartbroken. I was depressed. I hated myself. I didn't want to live."
McDermott, however, still took the blame for his faults in their longtime marriage's demise. According to the host, his struggles with addiction made him challenging to live with.
"It's going to be living the rest of my life making amends because I took something that was really beautiful and I just tore it down year after year, day after day," he said.
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McDermott announced in June after , noting in a later-deleted social media post that the pair "have decided to go our separate ways" and "start a new journey of our own."
"We will continue to work together as loving parents and guide and love our children through this difficult time," he continued. "We ask that you all respect our privacy as we take this time to surround our family with love and work our way through this. Thank you all for your support and kindness. 🙏"
McDermott and Spelling have begun moving on, with both of them being spotted out .
