Whether you have kids (real, human kids) or not, you might still be pampering and cuddling a little baby – your Dachshund! Here are a few signs your Dachshund is actually your child (and probably the baby child).
After all, you can't expect your own flesh and fur to sleep on anything less comfortable than a down-stuffed cushion, right?
And we're not just talking once a year. Sure, the good doggie parent gives their beloved pooch an annual fete, but an ultra-dog lover celebrates seven of them a year. After all, dogs have their own timetables to keep. Bonus coddling points if you make a dog-friendly birthday cake.
…. Because you're always carrying him or her. If you're in the habit of letting your pooch snuggle on your lap, tucking her into your handbag or carting him around in a doggie stroller, you've got a bona fide pet-child in your care.
You can't let your beloved doggie out of site long, so you have beautiful headshots professionally taken of her. That way you can keep her on your desk – and in your wallet, your locket and by your bedside table (okay, that might just be bordering on obsession).
It's like when you're talking to another mom or dad of your school-aged children, and you identify yourself as "so-and-so's-mom-or-dad"… Except we're not talking about human children. If you've ever introduced yourself as "Princess's dad," or "Rocko's mom," you have a dog-baby.
… but not for your own benefit. You take your little bundle of fur to the doggie spa for some in-depth relaxation and beauty treatments. After all, when your doggie is happy, everyone is happy (not to mention your "little one" probably knows Doggie District by smell!).
If your dog has a Facebook profile, Twitter handle or Instagram account all of her very own, well, you're a pet parent. Of course, you want to make sure she's always looking good for her fans, so you dress her up for fancy selfie shots.
If your doggie has carte blanch at the household furniture, he's not just your child – you're treating him better than most real children! Your doggie cuddles up in your sheets every night, and always has a place on the couch next to you.
When you're ordering in, you already know which leftovers (or if you're really bad, non-leftovers) your pet will enjoy the most. Got a pad thai junkie or a pepperoni fiend? You've got a doggie baby.